Hi! My name is Alishia and I am a KraftaholicMommy!
I know that it has been quite a while since my last post. I would like to reintroduce myself. My name is Alishia. I am 30 years old. I am a stay at home mom of an amazing and wild six year old who, just a few months ago, started his journey of homeschooling. I am addicted to Krafting; paper crafting, stamping, crochet, learning to knit, basically, you name it and I am going to at least give it the old college try. When I was 18 years old, I began a battle like no other. I was addicted to drugs and in a severely abusive relationship, mentally, emotionally, and physically. I got sober when I turned 20, however, I fell hard off that wagon about a year and a half later. I spent three years on and off the wagon as they say. On February 8th, 2011, I hit absolute rock bottom. I was jobless, homeless, and angrier than I had ever imagined possible. I will give a more detailed account of this journey one day, however to make things on the shorter side today, I got sober and have been clean for eight years and six months exactly as I am writing this.
I met my husband in 2011, he showed me how a man is suppose to treat a woman. He taught me that life can get better and that you should always enjoy the little blessings in life. We got our miracle baby boy in 2012 and got married in 2013. Yes, I am aware of the dates I just gave you. Yes, I am aware that I broadcast very loudly that I am a Christian. I know that some have pointed out that having a baby out of wedlock is a sin, guess what? Sins can be and are forgiven, you just have to ask with a sincere heart. I rededicated my life to God in 2013, with the birth of our son. Seeing that miracle come and all of the miracles associated with him, how could I not see God’s mighty hand at work.
I write all of this to you to not only reintroduce myself to you guys and gals, but to also give a bit more of my history. For the last two years, I have asked for you all to follow, like, comment, and share all of my posts and here I am not giving you all of me. I would like to rectify that. I would also like to explain why I have not posted in awhile.
This is not me making excuses, I don’t really tend to do that. However, I would like to say that I struggle and fight anxiety and depression. I have for most of my adult life. This is not a product of my childhood, I have the most amazing parents and a wonderful support system. They have definitely been here for me over these last few months.
One of the things that I have learned in talking to people about anxiety and depression; a bunch of people claim to be victims of it, but really know nothing about it. Those who don’t actually fight these demons, love to tell me to get over it or move on. I wish it were that simple. I usually put a smile on my face and try my best not to let it show. However, with a husband that knows me better than I know myself, he knew that this demon had reared it’s ugly face again. He would ask, I would deflect, because I would hate to bring him down.
I tend to become a lot more introverted than I already am. I tend to freak out over the tiniest of things. I do very well about not letting my son see this side of Mommy. I tell him that I need a moment and step in my room for that therapeutic deep breathe and cry. I have fought this for so long that I know it will pass, all I have to do is fight like heck to keep my head above the water.
I don’t get through this by not talking about it. I do talk about my feelings and what is racing through my mind. I talk to my mom and my husband eventually. First and foremost, I talk to God. I know He already knows what I am thinking and feeling. I ask him to help me fight the feelings and be myself again.
When the battle comes, I have made the mistake of taking a break from here, from you guys and gals. I will not do that again. I also can’t exactly say what my posting schedule will be like at this moment. I am still trying to find the time to get all of the things done each day, now that I am homeschooling our munchkin. However, I can promise that it will not be months of silence, even if it just a short hello post.
I am, as of the writing of this post, in my “okay time.” This is the short time after regaining myself, that I am not 100%, but definitely feeling a lot better. The anxiety is still there, but it isn’t as crippling. I am not fighting the depression as hard, it has slacked off almost completely. My “okay time” is a short tired period, that is quickly followed by “hello world, it’s happy Alishia.” I have noticed through the years, that my anxiety and depression has certainly not been as hard a battle as it once was. I have noticed that I am finding better coping mechanisms to help me get through these periods a lot quicker. Having God on speed dial, has certainly been the reason for this. I know that He is protecting me and helping me through. I know that my family loves me and they are here for me to help in anyway they can. To say that I am blessed, is the understatement of the year.
So, to end this on a happier note, I would like to take this time to be grateful. Thank you for not giving up on me and checking in on me. Thank you to my husband for helping me and being there for me through all of my chaos. Thank you to my parents for never judging me when I tell you my feelings and always offering a prayer and sound advice. Thank you to my church mom who has always loved me through all of the insanity, for always making sure that I knew that I had a place no matter how messed up I was. Thank you all of my family for never giving up on me. Most of all I want to thank God for seeing me through and giving me all of the amazing people that are in my life, including each and every one of you.
I am sorry if I have let anyone down and I certainly do appreciate all of the love and support you all have given me over the past few months. I am so blessed to have each and every one of you in my life and on this site.
I now have a P.O. Box feel free to send me cards, if you include the stamp, I will make you a card and send it back to you as well! You do not have to send me anything, I have been asked a lot to do so, I will also be sharing the cards and packages that I receive from you all on all of my social media, including this site! So, if you have a website or you have a business, I will happily shout you out! Thank you all so much!!
P.O. Box 608
Lake Panasoffkee, Fl 33538