self help, Thankful, Uncategorized

Building a Childhood Worth Remembering

Hi! My name is Alishia and I am a KraftaholicMommy!

Spring Break is in full swing here in the house. This is a great realization that I have nothing together at all! I love planning all of these fun things to do with the munchkin when he is out of school. Then I throw wrenches in the gears on getting these things done. Today, I will be leaving the house soon to go to the eye doctor for myself, with the munchkin. Yeah, I typed that sentence out. I wish it was just that, a typed sentence. I know how this is going to go. I am going to have in my head that this is going to go great. I’m going to go to the eye doctor, Monkey is going to sit down like a sweet little angel and work on his “work” (will explain) and I will be able to deal with my eyes being dilated without any hiccups. However, I know that the second the eye doctor dilates my eyes, my munchkin is going to need to ask me about seven thousand questions and will demand the answer. I am going to answer and things will take longer than the dilation and I will have to go through that fun stuff again. I am hoping that the new apps I downloaded will help with that.

The “work” I mentioned before. My husband and I do not typically let technology “babysit” our munchkin. I would normally schedule my eye doctors appointment on a day that Monkey would be in school. This is where my not having anything together right now comes in. I called to set up my much needed appointment and forgot all about the dates of Spring Break. So, the eye doctor’s office will be tablet “work.” I have downloaded some fun learning apps on my tablet. These apps are designed to help munchkins with where they are in learning. I am hoping that will provide a distraction for him for the entire time we are there. However, if it doesn’t I am a big purse kind of lady. I will have a fun little activity booklet in my purse. I will have his crayons, a few coloring sheets (about index card size…will explain), and some blank index cards for him to draw on. The index card size coloring sheets, I bet you’re wondering where I got those. I simply downloaded some coloring pages, sized them down so that four will fit on one 8” x 11” piece of cardstock and printed them out. From there I simply cut the pages and I am ready to roll. I put all of these supplies in a coloring box that I had on hand and Monkey will have everything in one spot. I will also be bringing him snacks.

I know that I am not alone in having a hard time remembering everything that goes on in the house. It is a lot to remember. I also know that I am not always going to have it together. Rather than beating myself up about it, I am going to adapt. I do not have all of the answers for being a mom. I learned a couple of years ago that I needed to stop comparing myself to other moms. Those moms that have it all together and seem to have everything going perfectly smooth, are not real. They’re not. They can post on social media how perfect their lives are and I hope that they are, however, I know that this world is not perfect. As much as we all would love to have that perfectly scheduled day, where nothing goes wrong, our kids do exactly what they are told without argument, and they keep the house clean without being told is a fantasy. It doesn’t make you a bad mom to admit you need help from time to time. It doesn’t make you a bad mom if you have to step in the next room for five minutes to process a few emotions or calm down. It doesn’t make you a bad mom to leave the kids with dad while you get your nails and feet done.

You are a mom, a fantastic mom. You don’t have to have every single thing perfect. The funny thing is, that completely wrecked plan, will be the thing your munchkin remembers and not the way you think. Allow me to share another short story.

When I was a kid, my parents took us to Alabama to visit family. We had such an amazing time. My aunt told us that there was a beautiful waterfall that you can visit near them where you can stand on the rocks right where the water drops off. I was over the moon excited to go on that hike and stand right in the middle of a waterfall. Anyone who knows me can attest to this, I am the world’s clumsiest human being. We get to this waterfall, my dad notices that the rocks are covered in algae and he warns us kids to be careful. I am not paying attention to him. My attention was on the awesome fish that I am stepping on rocks across this river, following. I step on the next rock, right where the water drops off, a very large, very dangerous drop off. I slip and fall, by the grace of God, my dad caught me before I fell down the waterfall. I would have either been seriously injured or, the more likely scenario, died. When I think about this event, I don’t think of it the way my parents do. They look back on that moment and they remember it with fear and heartache. I look back and see that my dad is the greatest hero I could ever possibly know. I remember the talks we had on our way to this waterfall, the jokes, my dad coming up with hilarious songs, and the joy on everyone’s faces. I don’t look at the fall and what could have happened, I see what happened and what God prevented through my hero.

This is how our munchkins are going to remember things from their childhood. They are going to remember the emotions of things far more than they’ll remember the material things. When Monkey grows up and he looks back on the day that I had to drag him to eye doctor, he is not going to remember how boring it was. He is going to remember the funny faces I’m going to make and the jokes I am going to crack while there. He is going to remember stopping at the park after and letting him run and play until he is good and tired and ready for a nap when we get home. I know that these are things he will remember, thanks to the advice my dad gave me.

When I was pregnant with my son, my dad told me not to focus on the material things when it comes to him. He told me that all that will do is take away from what I should be focused on. He told me to keep in mind the things I remember from growing up. I don’t remember how poor we were when I was really little, I remember listening to daddy singing out the ingredients he was putting them in the pot, while cooking. I remember my mom dancing with us kids around the house listening to George Strait and Alan Jackson. I remember my cousin coming to the house playing his guitar and singing for us kids. When the truly horrific things happened in my childhood, like in third grade when my best friend died in a house fire, I remember how my mom cried for my pain. How she and my dad would carry me to my own bed after I would fall asleep in theirs because of the nightmares. I remember how my parents hugged me and told me often that they loved me. I remember that even though they had three kids and not a lot of money, our house was so full of love, even visitors felt it.

That’s how I want Monkey to remember things. I don’t want him to only remember myself or my husband on our devices. I don’t want him only remembering him being on a device. That’s why my husband and I have a habit of putting the devices away and we have all of our attention on Monkey. We go fishing, we play board games, we play hide and seek, or like tonight, we surprise my husband with a game of nerf wars. We go to the park and we make things together, like the shelves.

We build memories as a family and that is how I pray Monkey remembers these days as a child. I want him to have a happy childhood. Having it all together and being able to balance it all is a new learning curve, every day. That’s okay. That’s life. I am happy to be alive and over the moon to have the family I have. I thank God every day for both my husband and my son. I also thank him for giving the parents that I have, the ones that gave me the advice I am giving you.

Thank you so much for stopping by today, I hope you enjoyed today’s post. If you did, please give this a like, comment, and share so others can join the fun as well. Until next time,

Thank You!

God Bless!

Happy Krafting!

-KraftaholicMommy

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